🎧 55. Are We Ever Really Finished?
What happens when liminal space ends (and we're ready to write!) but the same demands are waiting for us?
“When something is finished, it might mean something is true. It could mean someone will read your words. It means you now need to relate to this part of your life differently. You need to tell a new story about what happened to yourself. None of these things are bad, but when we're habituated to the old narratives, change is always hard.”
Today I’m answering a listener question: How do you know when you’re done?
It seems straightforward on the surface—you’re done when the essay is published, when the book comes out, or when the workshop is over. But not every writing project has defined edges. In fact, this episode argues that when we wonder if we’re done with something, we’re actually asking the wrong question.
Episode Highlights
Understanding the phases of completion
Questions to ask yourself to gauge where you are in the process
Examples of finishing—from blogging to Facebook groups
The advice MFK Fisher gave Ruth Reichel that changed the course of her career (and her relationship to finishing)
Linkable Mentions
Episode 26: Cultivating Trust in the Writer’s Life
Episode 50: Make Space, Not Time & Other Insights From the Sacred Pause
Conversation Starters
Are you almost finished with a draft? Ready to send that essay/poem/manuscript out into the world? Is there a nagging sense that it’s time to leave something behind (an old blog, a critique group) but you’re not sure what to do yet? A few questions to consider:
🖊 Have I taken this as far as I can?
🖊 What if? (What if I write the other thing? What if I try a new genre? What if I set something down? What if I walk away?)
🖊 How much headspace is this idea taking up? Does that feel just right, or too much?
🖊 Are you gripping this story/poem/essay for dear life, hindering your ability to move on? Are you scared to let it go, and what that might mean?
🖊 Or are you holding it loosely, trusting that it’s time to let this story live outside of you?
🖊 Am I emotionally prepared to move on?
🖊 Have I gotten what I need out of the work I’m currently doing?
Finishing doesn’t always have clearly defined edges. Even after a book is published, there was once the option to “continue polishing sentences forever,” as Ruth Reichel once said.
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Thanks for sharing this, Ashley! Decisions like that are always tough, even when they're right for us. Sounds like closing the blog has opened up some new pathways for you! That's what I always circle back to--yes it's hard to leave something behind or change course, but what is it making room for?
I really appreciated this episode, Nicole.❤️
I let my blog go a year ago and I’ve been writing and pursuing poetry on Substack since last fall. It was a really hard decision, but it felt right (and scary). It was validating to hear you talk about your process and the encouragement you offered to take pauses or just pursue different writing pursuits.